daily roundup

"She's just a jealous, ugly, anorexic idiot"

This video clip of Paris and sidekick skanks, Kim Stewart and Bijou Phillips is great!...As the sluts leave Koi for Spider and are besieged by paparazzi, Bijou hands a cell phone to Paris on which she hilariously crows,

"She's just a jealous, ugly, anorexic idiot...I know, it's pathetic!"

The best part is trying to deduce just which jealous anorexic Paris is referring to...Is it MK Olsen, confirmed anorexic and the latest victim of Paris' backstabbing sluttery? Or could it be Nicole Ritchie, anorexic du jour and long time Paris feud-er? Ot maybe it's Lindsay Lohan, sometimes anorexic and reportedly also a recent Paris Hater?

I guess when you're a stupid spoiled whore, you end up with a lot of hateration in your dancery!.

(via Gawker)
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R. Kelly Update!!!



OMG, an update on the antics in chapters 7 and 8 has been posted on Oh No They Didnt. Also, someone posted those amazing R. Kelly buttons above.:

The Latest From R. Kelly's 'Closet': Shots Fired — And A Spatula ...

In R. Kelly's newest episodes of "Trapped in the Closet," the guns are not only drawn — somebody gets blasted.

A video for Chapter 6 has hit the airwaves, and Chapters 7 and 8 are on the radio.

To backtrack, if you remember how Chapter 5 left off, Kelly's character of Sylvester found out his wife was cheating on him with a police officer who had just pulled him over and issued a speeding ticket (see "R. Kelly On The Genesis Of 'Trapped': 'It Was Like A Sucker Punch' " and "R. Kelly Shoots More Chapters For 'Trapped In The Closet' Saga").

Well, considering that Sylvester told his wife she was going to be "breathless" when he found out about the adultery, you'd think that he would totally spaz out at the beginning of Chapter 6. Well, no ...

In fact, his reaction is all the way at the other end of the spectrum: Sylvester breaks out in laughter, hysterical laughter. It seems that his crazy night and morning have been so wild, all he can do is laugh. His wife begins laughing as well — but their smiles soon become frowns of desperation when the cop Sylvester's wife has been cheating with returns to the house.

The officer feared for the woman's safety and busted back into the crib with his gun drawn. Sylvester, as you remember, is strapped with his trusty Beretta. In the middle of face-off, Sylvester lowers his weapon, but the thought of another man sleeping with his spouse enrages him and he leaps at the cop. A shot goes off as Chapter 6 closes.

At the start of Chapter 7, the suspense is at its peak. Who got shot? Sylvester? His wife? The cop?

Turns out it was Sylvester's brother-in-law Twan, who was briefly mentioned in Chapters 4 and 5. As Twan lies on the floor bleeding, the other people argue. You'll have to listen to song to find out Twan's fate, but know that at the end, a new character is introduced: "Rosie the Nosey Neighbor." She tries to engage in some heroics of her own heroics with her weapon of choice — a spatula.

As Chapter 8 commences, the officer finally makes it out of Sylvester's house and heads to his own crib. We meet his wife, Bridget, who has a deep Southern accent (Kelly actually sings in deep, down-bottom drawl when voicing her lines). Like everyone else in the story, Bridget is hiding something, too: Her lover is still in the house. Maybe he's trapped in the closet as well.

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"Human landfill"
The LA Times published an amazing 5-part series about the conditions on Skid Row downtown. As anyone who's seen it knows, Skid Row is a horrifying national disgrace- the fact that we allow our disabled, mentally ill,veterans, children, etc to live like this while turning a blind eye is really disgusting...Everyone, especially those of us who live in LA, should read this and learn more about the situation.

From the article "Demons are Winning on Skid Row":

Skid row exists because we've created it — although until now, with the downtown renaissance approaching its borders, we've mostly been able to ignore it.

By shutting mental hospitals, adding thousands to the rolls of medically uninsured, skimping on rehab and keeping social services out of respectable neighborhoods, we've guaranteed this teeming human landfill.

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Hear Yea! Hear Yea!...
...I'd like to take this opportunity to officially re-name the fetus, currently known as "Baby Cruise", (allegedly belonging to Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise)...

As of this moment, Baby Cruise shall be called....wait for it...

L. Spawn Hubbard


pic via Gawker
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"I told you, give me your first-born and I'll let you go"

Tom & Katie Expecting a Baby
Wednesday Oct 05, 2005 3:30pm EST

Tom Cruise's fiancée, Katie Holmes, is pregnant with the couple's child, Cruise's spokesperson, Lee Anne DeVette, tells PEOPLE exclusively.

"Tom and Katie are very excited, and the entire family is very excited," says DeVette.

Cruise, who has two children, Connor, 10, and Isabella, 12, with ex-wife Nicole Kidman, began dating Holmes in mid-April. He proposed to her atop the Eiffel Tower in Paris in June. DeVette says there is no wedding date set.

DeVette would not comment on the baby's gender or say how far along the pregnancy is. The rep did say that Holmes, 26, "has never felt better."

Cruise, 43, is currently shooting Mission: Impossible 3 in Los Angeles.

Let's hope she doesn't develop post-partum depression. Or maybe let's hope that she does...heeheehee. Ok, that was mean.
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A Very Apt Parallel


I, too, have always thought Star Jones showed more than a passing resemblence to Ursula the Sea Witch.
(pic via D-Listed)

P.S.
OMG, Vomit! Star Jones' banner headline on her website is "I am the author of the only dictionary that defines me". Ugh, what the fuck is that even supposed to MEAN?!?!
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What the...



ok, it's official. Nicole Ritchie is disgusting. She's gone from "so skinny that she looks like a 11 year-old boy" to "so skinny that you can't tell her front from her back." Nicole, get some help. Seriously. Please.

(pic via E!online and PITNB)
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Kate's Cocaine Caper: The Video

If you want to see the video from the great "Kate Moss Cocaine Investigation", it is here...

PS
I love the commentary...

"Anyone who doesn’t even put their cigarette down to do coke should be arrested just on general principle."

Hee!
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